Oh! I forgot!

... I always heard that you could tell a real pearl from faux by rubbing it against your teeth. However, I never had a chance to test the theory. Well, it's true.

How do I know? Because I got my very first ever Mother's Day present on Sunday. A Wish Pearl, still in the shell, and the necklace in which to wear it. I had to go searching through the remains of the creature to find it with the little spatula provided... icky but worth it. Yes, I made a wish. No, I'm not telling. ;) And I got a gold-coloured pearl, which, according to the box, is for wealth. Go figure. It might have been white, cream, peach, or lavender... for wisdom, success, health, or love, in that order. I'll ponder the choices I didn't make some other day. But it was a bright spot in an otherwise unhappy day, and I can't believe I forgot to post it. :)

because sitting here sniffling isn't on my agenda.

From the background noise when my mother called an hour ago, the funeral didn't dampen anyone's spirits excessively. We may not be Irish, but Trinidadians believe in cheerful wakes anyway.

So that's that, I suppose. And now we move on.

I uploaded some new images to my fractal directory; mostly variants on a theme. These are pretty representative.



( two more, kinda large. )

(no subject)

There was a time, you know.

There used to be days I just glided through, and waking up brought questions of what the day was going to hold that didn't hurt and didn't make me uneasy.

One of our old houses, not the first but probably close, there was a birds' nest under the eaves. Starlings, probably, house sparrows or somesuch... but they sang, every morning, as soon as the light started to show the outlines of leaves and branches. It was almost as wonderful a way to wake up as feeling the sun warm on my face, and smelling the scent of the pine slats as the sap warmed.

Even when I was older, and things began to be less like a fairy tale and more like a nightmare I couldn't wake out of, there were good days. Monkeys at a distance, gumming tree branches to catch budgies, lying flat on my stomach on Melissa's stone bridge, watching the fish in the pond.

I had my share of good days. Highs that match any low I've ever gone through. And now I'd really like balance. Not being in despair one second and giggly the next and never knowing which way I'm going to want to topple next - that would be good.

(no subject)

Small change made to my friends list, which only affects one person. It is personal. It isn't because I dislike you, though, and I am not angry at you, but I need some more stability in my life than I've had lately. Pins and needles don't agree with me. I was going to do this earlier, but doing it while you were gone with no explanation you'd see any time predictably soon seemed a low blow. I'm still around if you'd like to discuss things, but I'm not going to push, I am not going to initiate dialogue, and this is something I do feel I need to do.

I am sorry.