Dancing the Storm

[kuangning]

So scattered tonight. Today was better, though. I've set my timer for fifteen minutes - I will not see the sunrise from this side of the night tonight.

But I've got half-thoughts and broken images in my mind, I'm in a mental space somewhere between floating and falling.

And I don't know which one I'd prefer.

Nothing self-destructive. But I'm on the verge of spilling over, on the brink of breaking free... and freefall appeals. I poured you out joy, do you remember? I poured you out joy like honey in sunlight, and your responses delighted me. I'm not a vessel of joy tonight. I've split in places, the joy leaked through and the air came in, the tears seeped through the walls and what was left wasn't pure joy. I put the lid on, I let things ferment... and then. And then you gifted me with thoughts to kindle electric fires in my mind, fuel on which to feed. And tonight, I'm smouldering. Change is everywhere.



Tonight, I'm pouring you out the storm.

Radical change in the most potent form. I'm calling down the lightning - will you dance the storm with me? What will you do with the gift? What will you change? Will you seize the thinnnest thread, perform delicate surgery on the frayed or fraying places? Or will you grasp it in both hands and change the world as it changes you? Don't think too hard... lightning doesn't last long, it burns out and burns away. Tell me, right now, this second... what are you willing to change? And are you willing to be transformed?

Comments

[minn.livejournal.com]

> Tell me, right now, this second... what are you willing to change? And are you willing to be transformed?

I am willing to let go of the anger in me that few know about. I want to change that. For my sake, & for the sake of a few near & dear ones.

The anger & the frustration from deep within, is something I *want* to be rid of.

[helbug.livejournal.com]

calling down the lightning
dancing the storm

i will sing to the thunder with you and welcome change. even the tiniest bit, as
blake so sagely proclaimed," the man whose opinion never changes is like the
standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind."

and who knows exactly what that change may be but in the calm after the storm,
all is anew and fresh.

your writing is so incredible poignant beauty. thanks for touching so many people

Change

[wiredferret.livejournal.com]

I am change right now. I am changing so much that every morning and every night, I catalog what is different since my last sleep, since last month, since last year.

I have become a soul conductor, and I will never be the same. I'm terrified. I'm ecstatic. Energy is being drawn into my body and spun into cells and mind and organs and hope. Energy from myself and from others. I feel like I'm standing in the eye of the storm, pulling it tightly around me.

I am become death. I am bringing further mortality into the world. I am gambling for unimaginable stakes. I have signed up for an indefinite tour of duty.

I choose, have chosen, will choose to change myself. I ask my loves to change how they relate to me. I ask my husband to change with me.

[zorbathut.livejournal.com]

*smiles* it's been too long since I felt like that.