Dancing the Storm
Jun. 12th, 2002 02:26 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kuangningSo scattered tonight. Today was better, though. I've set my timer for fifteen minutes - I will not see the sunrise from this side of the night tonight.
But I've got half-thoughts and broken images in my mind, I'm in a mental space somewhere between floating and falling.
And I don't know which one I'd prefer.
Nothing self-destructive. But I'm on the verge of spilling over, on the brink of breaking free... and freefall appeals. I poured you out joy, do you remember? I poured you out joy like honey in sunlight, and your responses delighted me. I'm not a vessel of joy tonight. I've split in places, the joy leaked through and the air came in, the tears seeped through the walls and what was left wasn't pure joy. I put the lid on, I let things ferment... and then. And then you gifted me with thoughts to kindle electric fires in my mind, fuel on which to feed. And tonight, I'm smouldering. Change is everywhere.
Tonight, I'm pouring you out the storm.
Radical change in the most potent form. I'm calling down the lightning - will you dance the storm with me? What will you do with the gift? What will you change? Will you seize the thinnnest thread, perform delicate surgery on the frayed or fraying places? Or will you grasp it in both hands and change the world as it changes you? Don't think too hard... lightning doesn't last long, it burns out and burns away. Tell me, right now, this second... what are you willing to change? And are you willing to be transformed?
But I've got half-thoughts and broken images in my mind, I'm in a mental space somewhere between floating and falling.
And I don't know which one I'd prefer.
Nothing self-destructive. But I'm on the verge of spilling over, on the brink of breaking free... and freefall appeals. I poured you out joy, do you remember? I poured you out joy like honey in sunlight, and your responses delighted me. I'm not a vessel of joy tonight. I've split in places, the joy leaked through and the air came in, the tears seeped through the walls and what was left wasn't pure joy. I put the lid on, I let things ferment... and then. And then you gifted me with thoughts to kindle electric fires in my mind, fuel on which to feed. And tonight, I'm smouldering. Change is everywhere.
Tonight, I'm pouring you out the storm.
Radical change in the most potent form. I'm calling down the lightning - will you dance the storm with me? What will you do with the gift? What will you change? Will you seize the thinnnest thread, perform delicate surgery on the frayed or fraying places? Or will you grasp it in both hands and change the world as it changes you? Don't think too hard... lightning doesn't last long, it burns out and burns away. Tell me, right now, this second... what are you willing to change? And are you willing to be transformed?