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kenhighcountry asks about LJ and Journaling.
Jun. 4th, 2002 11:28 amkuangning1) Why do you keep a journal on LJ?
Primarily, I started journaling to get my thoughts outside of myself and into some place where I could take a step back from them and really look at them. I was also intending to tell some of my stories - it's become less about that and more about the contact, though, with my original goal staying pretty constant.
2) Do you keep, or have you kept in the past, a paper journal?
Yes, I used to. But my parents would look for it and read it, and then I got in trouble for what I said in it... after about the third time that happened, I stopped keeping one altogether.
3) What, to you, is the primary difference between the two?
My LJ entries are more controlled. I usually wait longer before posting something here than I did when I was simply scribbling things down as I went. As a result, things like grocery lists, budget calculations, and random thoughts that mean nothing to anyone but me generally don't make it here.
4) How would you characterize the bulk of your LJ entries? (i.e.; informational, emotional, chatty, daily, etc.)
I honestly don't know. I try to shun over-emotional posting, both because it usually doesn't help me stay level, and because of the backlash it can bring. I try for introspection because that was the point of journaling in the first place. But often after I've posted something introspective or with a lot of emotion wrapped up in it, I need to retreat and be careless and chatty again for awhile and not look at that post, just to avoid being panicky over it. So it's probably pretty balanced.
5) In keeping a journal on LJ, are you aware, as you write, of having an audience?
I'd be lying if I said no. When I want to be unaware of an audience, I set it private before I start writing the entry. From my prior experience with paper journaling, though, I'm aware of the audience with most everything I write. I almost never assume no-one's going to see it but me anymore.
6) How much does that influence what you write here?
It doesn't, much. Some of the more vicious things don't get posted - I can be a very angry, vindictive person at times. But more often when I need to write out that part of me, I do post it, just set private. One effect it does have is that I've picked up a more conversational tone with what I do post.
7) Do you ever enhance reality in your journal to make for better reading?
Nope. Why should I do that, when every journaler already has the freedom to tell only what they feel is worth telling? I don't post every mundane happening here. I often don't tell things here that aren't mundane. But what I do tell, I try to tell completely and fairly, and even when I'm angry, I do try to remember to point out that I am angry and that there is another point of view.
8) How important are responses to you?
Getting them for the sake of getting them isn't. The ones that make me reaffirm the decision to keep the comments feature turned on are the ones that give me something to think about, something more than a nod and a hug - though sometimes a nod and a hug is all a friend's capable of giving, and I understand that. Some of the things I post - well, if I can't think how to respond to something, I don't expect anyone else to have answers, either.
9) Does it matter to you how many people are on your friends list, one way or the other?
Nope. My friends list is not a friends list. It is a "you amuse me" list plus a "you make me think" list plus an "I don't know what to make of you" list plus a "you write truly well list" plus an "I just want to know you better" list, the combination of which contains the people I count as friends.
10) Do you ever post when you don't really feel like it because you feel obligated to?
I try not to fall into that. I've taken many breaks from posting, for different reasons. If I'm gone awhile, I do try, out of consideration for the people who do worry about me (Ben, Doug, etc) - to say that I'm around, just quiet. Because there have been the times when I wasn't around because I wasn't okay.
11) Do you ever comment when you don't really feel like it because you feel obligated to?
I have, and I disliked the feeling. The person in question was important enough to me that the ickiness was worth it, in my mind, but still... I won't allow myself to fall into that for just anyone. I comment when I have something real to say or when I want it to be understood that I care and I'm listening.
12) How well do you think that the people who read your journal on a regular basis know you?
Not as well as they probably believe, if they don't know me outside of LJ as well or haven't interacted with me beyond one or two comments in my journal. I'm trying to be better about that, to make my entries show more of who I am. I've noticed that people seem to think, just because I put things into words that they wouldn't, that I'm remarkably brave and open. The truth is, my hangups are just in different places, and the revelations that impress them aren't a struggle for me. The things closer to my heart get spoken of once or twice a year and then I have to move on for awhile - that's how you know it matters, because it doesn't come easily.
13) How would you rate your journal compared to those of your friends? (Take into account such things as interest, depth, knowledge, information, and anything else that may apply.)
I can't compare, even if I wanted to. My friends and I are all very different people with very different styles.
14) To what degree, if any, are you on LJ for social reasons?
In the beginning, the social reasons were irrelevant. Now, I'd say it's a major motivation. Not the major motivation, but I've grown used to and enjoy greatly the sense of contact I have here.
Primarily, I started journaling to get my thoughts outside of myself and into some place where I could take a step back from them and really look at them. I was also intending to tell some of my stories - it's become less about that and more about the contact, though, with my original goal staying pretty constant.
2) Do you keep, or have you kept in the past, a paper journal?
Yes, I used to. But my parents would look for it and read it, and then I got in trouble for what I said in it... after about the third time that happened, I stopped keeping one altogether.
3) What, to you, is the primary difference between the two?
My LJ entries are more controlled. I usually wait longer before posting something here than I did when I was simply scribbling things down as I went. As a result, things like grocery lists, budget calculations, and random thoughts that mean nothing to anyone but me generally don't make it here.
4) How would you characterize the bulk of your LJ entries? (i.e.; informational, emotional, chatty, daily, etc.)
I honestly don't know. I try to shun over-emotional posting, both because it usually doesn't help me stay level, and because of the backlash it can bring. I try for introspection because that was the point of journaling in the first place. But often after I've posted something introspective or with a lot of emotion wrapped up in it, I need to retreat and be careless and chatty again for awhile and not look at that post, just to avoid being panicky over it. So it's probably pretty balanced.
5) In keeping a journal on LJ, are you aware, as you write, of having an audience?
I'd be lying if I said no. When I want to be unaware of an audience, I set it private before I start writing the entry. From my prior experience with paper journaling, though, I'm aware of the audience with most everything I write. I almost never assume no-one's going to see it but me anymore.
6) How much does that influence what you write here?
It doesn't, much. Some of the more vicious things don't get posted - I can be a very angry, vindictive person at times. But more often when I need to write out that part of me, I do post it, just set private. One effect it does have is that I've picked up a more conversational tone with what I do post.
7) Do you ever enhance reality in your journal to make for better reading?
Nope. Why should I do that, when every journaler already has the freedom to tell only what they feel is worth telling? I don't post every mundane happening here. I often don't tell things here that aren't mundane. But what I do tell, I try to tell completely and fairly, and even when I'm angry, I do try to remember to point out that I am angry and that there is another point of view.
8) How important are responses to you?
Getting them for the sake of getting them isn't. The ones that make me reaffirm the decision to keep the comments feature turned on are the ones that give me something to think about, something more than a nod and a hug - though sometimes a nod and a hug is all a friend's capable of giving, and I understand that. Some of the things I post - well, if I can't think how to respond to something, I don't expect anyone else to have answers, either.
9) Does it matter to you how many people are on your friends list, one way or the other?
Nope. My friends list is not a friends list. It is a "you amuse me" list plus a "you make me think" list plus an "I don't know what to make of you" list plus a "you write truly well list" plus an "I just want to know you better" list, the combination of which contains the people I count as friends.
10) Do you ever post when you don't really feel like it because you feel obligated to?
I try not to fall into that. I've taken many breaks from posting, for different reasons. If I'm gone awhile, I do try, out of consideration for the people who do worry about me (Ben, Doug, etc) - to say that I'm around, just quiet. Because there have been the times when I wasn't around because I wasn't okay.
11) Do you ever comment when you don't really feel like it because you feel obligated to?
I have, and I disliked the feeling. The person in question was important enough to me that the ickiness was worth it, in my mind, but still... I won't allow myself to fall into that for just anyone. I comment when I have something real to say or when I want it to be understood that I care and I'm listening.
12) How well do you think that the people who read your journal on a regular basis know you?
Not as well as they probably believe, if they don't know me outside of LJ as well or haven't interacted with me beyond one or two comments in my journal. I'm trying to be better about that, to make my entries show more of who I am. I've noticed that people seem to think, just because I put things into words that they wouldn't, that I'm remarkably brave and open. The truth is, my hangups are just in different places, and the revelations that impress them aren't a struggle for me. The things closer to my heart get spoken of once or twice a year and then I have to move on for awhile - that's how you know it matters, because it doesn't come easily.
13) How would you rate your journal compared to those of your friends? (Take into account such things as interest, depth, knowledge, information, and anything else that may apply.)
I can't compare, even if I wanted to. My friends and I are all very different people with very different styles.
14) To what degree, if any, are you on LJ for social reasons?
In the beginning, the social reasons were irrelevant. Now, I'd say it's a major motivation. Not the major motivation, but I've grown used to and enjoy greatly the sense of contact I have here.
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no subject
Date: 2002-06-06 12:37 am (UTC)Re:
Date: 2002-06-06 10:16 am (UTC)